"is it okay not to get married for the rest of your life?" That's the best answer.
Beautiful morning light, accompany you to read.
01
Last month, my 40-year-old single girlfriend and I had a random chat. She suddenly asked:
in fact, this question has been asked by many people before her, with different personalities, different regions and different situations.
Let me just give my opinion.
in youth, few people do not yearn for love and marriage. Some people meet love and hold hands with those who love each other.
but not all people can meet love and enter into marriage. More often, they marry the same people, live the same life, and make do for the rest of their lives.
there are also some people who do not want to make do with it until the boss still does not wait for the one in his or her heart, preferring lack to abuse, unwittingly reaching middle age.
since ancient times, there has been a saying that men should marry and women should marry. Marriage is almost everyone's KPI. As long as you can't finish it, you will get some strange eyes, as well as the urging of seven aunts and aunts to get married.
but why do people get married?
I think that apart from the factor of reproduction, it is more for the purpose of mutual support and stalemate.
Slide into charming casual wedding dresses and flaunt your sexy figure. Let them shower you with a display of exquisite taste.
Life is like a night road, more often, find a person to walk together, in order to reduce some loneliness and fear on the road.
in the hit drama "just Thirty," Gu Jia once said:
in fact, marriage is also true.
many times, people get married to give themselves a way back. when you are tired and tired, there is no way to go, there is still a home to go back to, and there is someone who can back you up.
02
not long ago, Luo Yonghao, who had paid 400 million yuan in debt, was said to have a bad temper, but he almost never lost his temper with his wife at home.
he said that his marriage was very happy. He had been married for many years with endless words. No matter how bad it was, he would go home and have a chat with her. When he smelled her, his heart would settle down.
she was like his own medicine. He can cure his illness anytime and anywhere.
I read an article about Fatty Luo before. he is a very difficult man, but he always seems to have bad luck and always fails to start a business, so he is so heavily in debt that he owes 600 million yuan.
however, instead of breaking the jar, he worked hard to make money to pay off the debt, and he planned to pay off the debt in another year.
Fatty Luo said on the talk show that his wife's reaction after he was in debt. Although I know there was an element of teasing, I could not help but respect the wife who did not give up when her husband owed NT $600 million.
this is not what every woman can do. At the bottom of Lao Luo's life, she accompanied him step by step to give him warmth and strength. Who would not want such a marriage?
however, not every marriage is like this, and not everyone can be the beneficiary of marriage.
03
Jiang Fangzhou also said:
Yes, marriage is not a romantic fantasy, but a realistic fantasy; marriage is not an umbrella for the weak, and if you live in a mess, getting married won't get better.
Yu Xiuhua, a poet with cerebral palsy, because of her limited conditions, she worked at home after graduating from high school. Her parents worried that she had no place to go. When she was 19 years old, they found her a door-to-door son-in-law.
this man is very poor, but when he marries Yu Xiuhua, he doesn't have to buy his own house.
in the opinion of Yu Xiuhua's mother, a disabled girl in the countryside can do nothing, and it is already the best destination to find a man with such an able-bodied body.
however, in this marriage, Yu Xiuhua has tasted a lot of pain. She has never been treated well by her husband, domestic violence, ridicule, abuse, these are all common occurrence.
she thought about divorce, but divorce also needs capital. She didn't have it, so she had to put up with it.
unexpectedly, in 2015, she suddenly became famous and had some money with the poem "go through most of China to sleep with you".
in the documentary "staggering in the World," Yu Xiuhua took out most of her royalties, gave her husband 150000 yuan, and promised to build him a two-story house in the village. The two agreed to divorce.
on the day of divorce, Yu Xiuhua was very happy. She was finally relieved. She was free with money and was no longer bullied by her husband.
so you see, not as long as you get married, all the problems will be easily solved, maybe there will be more and more troubles, or even not as good as being single.
04
maybe you will say, how lonely it is to be unmarried!
being single and lonely is something that some people think is scary, while others think it is a kind of enjoyment.
my sister has an obstetrician in her seventies downstairs. At this age, she still makes house calls every day. Because she is busy at work, she misses the time to talk about marriage. Later, she talked about several of them, but none of them were suitable, so she simply stopped looking for them when she was older.
she has been interviewed by the media. Will she regret not getting married or having children all her life?
she said: this is the life of my choice, and it is enough for me to feel good.
05
A few days ago, Hong Kong singer Gillian said in an interview that she was not fit to get married and would not marry again.
speaking of Gillian, although she is an artist, she doesn't seem to have any works that can be taken out. What is most remembered is the "porn Photo door" incident in 2008.
from then on, she seemed to be a street mouse, swearing everywhere she went.
in fact, thinking about the poor girl, she just fell in love, not a third party.
in the case of a concubine, she took a private picture of the two.But she didn't want the photos to be leaked by the computer repairman, and she fell from the cloud to the quagmire.
she finally got married in 2018, and people thought she had found her own happiness, but she separated in less than a year.
it is said that the man is rumored to be having an affair, and the two sides' values are not on the same line at all, so they agreed to divorce.
A relationship expert I like very much commented that
mature women do not want to remarry after divorce, basically understanding the nature of marriage.
Women who have been emotionally hurt will cherish themselves more and are no longer willing to wronge themselves.
there's nothing wrong with this. Marriage is no longer the only choice for happiness.
Yes, marriage does not necessarily mean happiness, and being single does not mean misfortune, they are just a way of life, and the choice is in your own hands.
06
whether or not to get married and whether to have children is just a choice question on the personal menu bar. It doesn't matter whether it's right or wrong, and there are no specific criteria. You can choose whichever you like.
if you get married, you should be two people in love who are willing to go to a better future together, rather than to a certain age.
get married because of marriage. In that way, you tend to get more disappointment.
find a good person, be a good person, have a good marriage, you will feel that the world is worth it.