It is not the children who need education most in China, but the parents, especially the fathers.
Good morning, accompany you to read.
the biggest misunderstanding of Chinese parents is that as long as they have a marriage certificate, they can have children; as long as they have the ability to have children, they have the ability to educate their children.
any adult can educate the child. You don't have to worry about giving the child to your grandparents, or even to the babysitter.
many Chinese parents do not begin to panic about their children's educational problems until their children become "problem students" at school.
to educate children, only love is not enough. Only by understanding the law of children's growth can there be a good future.
it is not children but parents who need education most in China.
when you have a baby, you can't "return it".
educating children is the most important and difficult knowledge of human beings.
parents are class teachers whose children will never retire and have a responsibility for their children's life. No matter how successful parents are in their careers, they are not worth the consequences of failure in educating their children.
all parents want to educate their children well, but none of us have done pre-job training, so we become parents in a hurry.
therefore, before educating our children, we parents should also receive education to learn how to be qualified parents.
01
you need to understand the child
Don't miss the critical period of the child's development
the critical period of development: it refers to the mastery of certain behaviors, skills and knowledge of human beings. it develops the fastest in a certain period and is the most easily affected.
how many critical periods of child development do you know?
critical period of learning chewing (6 months): the most important learning period in infancy.
critical period of order norms (2.5-6 years old): the critical period for the formation of children's behavior habits, during which the character, behavior and habits formed will not change until they grow up. "look old at three and old at seven."
the critical period of language development (3-6 years old): children about 3 years old can basically master all the pronunciation and grammar of their mother tongue, and then their language ability will be further developed.
the critical period of imagination development (age 2-8): this is the stage to protect your child's curiosity and imagination.
culturally sensitive period (6-10 years old): many children in this period are very curious, brainstorming and have a lot of problems. Children's desire for knowledge should be satisfied.
Golden Reading period (412 years old): if you miss the scientific reading guidance and a lot of reading during this period, it will cause irreparable defects to the growth of children.
Independent critical period (12-15 years old): if you don't grasp this paragraph well, the child will never grow up.
02
you should know maternal love and fatherly love
maternal love: virtue, etiquette, character and temperament. The mother has a great influence on her child's infancy and childhood.
fatherly love: directional guidance and rational behavior. A great father must be the guide of his children and the founder of ideas.
Law: the maternal love needed for children's growth shows a decreasing trend, while paternal love shows an increasing trend.
before children go to school, they generally need more maternal love.
the connecting stage of primary and secondary schools is the end of the romantic stage and the beginning of the precise stage of children's growth, and it is the transition period from maternal love to fatherly love.
during this period, maternal love should be appropriately reduced and paternal love should be increased.
03
what parents should do for their children
1. Improve yourself and grow up with your children.
No one is born to be parents. We can only continue to learn educational knowledge, improve ourselves, and then educate our children according to their actual situation and grow up with them.
2. Teach by example and set an example for children.
parents are the first teachers of their children, and their children are a mirror of their parents. Parents' shortcomings will be reflected in their children. As parents, they should always pay attention to their words and deeds and set a good example for their children.
3. Be good at discovering life and teach children the truth with the little things in life.
A thing, only when you have done it, do you know whether it is right or wrong, a road, and only when you have walked through it do you know its rugged. It's the same with kids.
04
advice to my father
1. The way to get off work should be the way home.
as a father, he must be aware of the educational responsibility on his shoulders and remember that the way to get off work should be the way home, and children who eat with their parents are better.
2. Love your family, especially your wife.
as a father, it is the basic responsibility of a father to create a good family environment, which can bring sense of security and love to his children. If a father loves his mother, his children will grow up with love.
3. Play sports and play with children.
A man is also a naive big child, and the father is the child's best playmate. Only with the father can the child really let go and have fun, and only the father can give the child a brave and cheerful spirit of exploration.
4. Show the children the world.
tell your children about work life, show them all kinds of society, and the father uses his eyes to lead his children to slowly get in touch with this society and use their own experience to help them figure out a way.
generally speaking, mothers are more family-oriented and fathers are more social, which is what fathers should do.
05
six family education proverbs, parents must know
the first sentence: good parents are learned.
there are no naturally successful parents and no parents who do not need to learn. Successful parents are the result of continuous learning and improvement.
I have come into contact with so many outstanding parents, noOne is the easy success of the godson.
an excellent mother even said: many people think that I am very relaxed, saying that your child is so good that you don't have to worry about it at all, but I even have an eye open when I sleep at night!
entering the 21st century, the information society has higher and higher requirements for the quality of people, and any post requires training and assessment, but it seems that only giving birth to and educating children do not need training, as if they will be laid off automatically and will never be laid off. in fact, this kind of understanding is wrong.
second sentence: good children are taught.
I have come into contact with hundreds of excellent parents. One thing they have in common is their painstaking efforts in educating their children, just as Shen Liping, one of the country's top ten outstanding mothers, had not said it herself. People would not have thought that she had put so much effort behind the growth of her son Wang Jiapeng.
some people may say, there are so many parents who can't read a word, don't they also educate good children?
in fact, illiteracy is not uneducated. These parents are also good at educating their children.
third sentence: all good habits are nurtured.
many parents blame their children's bad habits on the school, on the teachers, on the children themselves, but not on themselves.
in fact, most of the habits in children, whether good or bad, are cultivated by our parents intentionally or unintentionally.
parents are often the biggest makers of their children's problems and the biggest obstacle for their children to correct their mistakes and shortcomings.
the urgent task is not to educate the children, but to educate the parents. Without the change of the parents, there will be no change of the children.
there are no children who do not want to learn well, only children who cannot learn well, no children who do not educate well, and only
parents who do not know how to educate.
therefore, only by scolding yourself before scolding your child and beating yourself before hitting your child can you completely change yourself.
fourth sentence: all good grades are helped.
the whole society should have a correct understanding of quality education and examination-oriented education.
examination-oriented education is a problem that can not be avoided by schools and parents, and it needs to be adapted by both schools and parents.
there is no contradiction between examination ability education and quality education. Quality education without examination ability is not a real quality education.
therefore, it is our parents' duty to help our children adapt to the examination-oriented education, and the best way to help our children reduce the burden is for our parents to increase the burden, that is, our parents can become their children's mentors.
the fifth sentence: good communication is heard.
for parents whose children enter middle and high school, there is a common confusion, that is, it is difficult to communicate with their children.
there are more conflicts between children entering puberty and mothers entering menopause, not only because they are in an internal period of psychological turmoil, but more importantly, both have great external pressure, and children face the pressure of going to school. mothers are facing career pressure, which requires more communication.
most excellent parents do a good job in this respect, and their good communication comes from consciously following these three principles:
the first step is to listen, that is, to get the child to speak out and understand the true meaning of the child's words.
the second step is to understand, that is, to think about whether it makes sense from the child's point of view, and the result is often reasonable.
the third step is advice, which makes sense. Children may not be able to take the right action, so parents should give advice here.
of the three steps, listening is the worst for parents.
every child grows up with a problem, and every parent grows up with a problem. Children who do not encounter problems cannot be found, and parents who do not encounter problems cannot be found. The key is to be able to calm down like those good parents to find a solution to the problem.
sixth sentence: good achievements are all civilized.
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Intelligence is not the most important. What is more important than intelligence is the will, what is more important than the will is the mind, and what is more important than the mind is morality.
and these are the most important things in one's growth.
when we read biographies, we are often deeply impressed by the remarkable performance of the characters when they are young, because this kind of achievement motivation has a great influence on people.
the most important factors, such as will, mind, and moral character, can produce results not through parents' preaching and other "obvious education", but through parents' behavior, that is, "latent education" into the child's flesh and blood.