Middle-aged: sober to do things, confused to be a man

there is a saying: "there are only two things in one's life."

being sober is a skill.

being confused is a kind of wisdom.

in life, the younger you are, the more impetuous you are.

when you reach middle age, may you become more calm and calm after going through the world.

01

doing things soberly

is a skill

there is a saying: "when things are urgent, they are slow, while things are slow, they are round."

people tend to do things impulsively when they are young.

when you disagree, you get angry, and when things don't go well, you get angry.

as you get older, you will learn to integrate into the world after you have suffered losses and hit the wall.

Zuo Zongtang, a famous minister of the late Qing Dynasty, worked as an aide under Luo Bingzhang, governor of Hunan Province when he was young. He was somewhat arrogant because of his outstanding talent.

at that time, Fan Xie, a general soldier of Yongzhou, went to Changsha to meet Luo Bingzhang, the Lord of Futai. Luo Bingzhang asked him to see Zuo Zongtang beside him.

but Fan Xie did not do so, saying in a contemptuous tone: "I am the general soldier of the second grade of the imperial court. Is there any reason to greet the staff of the fourth grade?"

Zuo Zongtang was furious when he heard this, and the two formed a feud.

soon after, Fan Xie was impeached by Luo Bingzhang for embezzlement. Fan Xie thought this was a personal feud issued by Zuo Zongtang, so he complained to Hubei Governor Guanwen.

after listening to the official text, he complained to Emperor Xianfeng, and later because a number of officials who appreciated Zuo Zongtang interceded with Emperor Xianfeng, he was allowed to avoid this calamity in times of crisis.

there is a saying: "if you can't bear it, you will make a mess."

the more tit-for-tat, it will bring countless troubles to yourself.

hold back your anger for a moment and act on impulse in order to better avoid disasters.

in the seven years of Xianfeng, Zeng Guofan, who had reached middle age, followed the rule of returning home in the name of losing his father.

during this period of time, Zeng Guofan reflected on his dedication to the court wholeheartedly, but he was always frustrated in officialdom because he was too stiff, spoke too bluntly, and acted too bluntly.

later, after he came out again, his attitude towards Emperor Xianfeng changed greatly. He no longer pushed three obstacles and four conditions, and even if he was unwilling to accept it, he did not refute it directly and knew how to deal with it in a roundabout way.

in addition, officials of all sizes in the imperial court are more polite and easygoing, and they avoid being enemies and know how to politely refuse when they encounter difficulties.

it was because of this that Zeng Guofan turned things around and became famous all his life.

there is a saying: "only when you keep calm can you get things done."

when people are younger, it is always difficult to control their emotions and temper.

after middle age, you should not only learn to do things clearly, but also learn to weigh the pros and cons.

being self-willed is an instinct and a skill to know how to converge.

the more mature a person is, the less likely he is to be emotional.

02

being confused

is wisdom

Zheng Banqiao once said, "it is difficult to be smart, it is difficult to be confused, and it is even more difficult to change from being smart to being confused."

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sometimes, to be magnanimous is to let others go and not to embarrass yourself.

know how to let go, not only to forgive others, but also not to add trouble and trouble to yourself.

there is a story in the Book of New Tang Dynasty.

after Wu Zetian became emperor, he appointed Di Renjie as prime minister.

one day, Wu Zetian asked Di Renjie, "you used to work in Runan with excellent performance and were very popular with the people." But there are some people who always slander and frame you. Do you want to know? "

Di Renjie immediately pleaded guilty and said, "if your Majesty thinks that those slanders and false accusations are my fault, I should listen to them and correct them.

if your Majesty thinks that it is not my fault, that will be a great blessing for me. As for who is slandering and framing, and how, I don't want to know. "

after hearing this, Wu Zetian not only dispelled his doubts about Di Renjie, but even praised him for his magnanimity and magnanimity.

in the combination of maxims, there is a saying:

in life, we will inevitably encounter slander and slander by others.

when we were young, we always wanted to argue with reason.

when you get older, you will understand that those who are clean are clear, and those who are muddy are self-turbid.

to be confused, you don't have to take it seriously everywhere in order to live more freely and freely.

at the end of the Western Han Dynasty, Wang Mang usurped power, the world was disrupted, and the people were living in poverty.

Liu Xiu mobilized his troops and won the world. At that time, after Liu Xiu led his soldiers into Handan, he organized the soldiers under his hands to count the official documents of the previous dynasty.

in the playbooks of the former dynasty, the soldiers found a lot of flattering Wang Mang and belittling Liu Xiu. So he immediately reported to Liu Xiu,

and said angrily, "these people secretly contacted Wang Mang and even insulted you, and they must be severely punished."

when Liu Xiu heard this, not only did he not pursue the matter, but immediately, in front of former officials, he burned all these playbooks.

and said to them, "I have not seen these playbooks, and I will never open them. You can feel at ease."

Liu Xiu is not stupid. He knows very well that he is in troubled times, and many people can't help it. If we settle old accounts in this matter, it will upset the morale of the army, and the losses will outweigh the gain.

there is a saying: "when you come out of the hole, you have to forgive others and forgive others."

sometimes, it is the greatest wisdom to ignore it.

to be one foot wide with others is to widen one's own way.

giving way to others is also broadening your own path.

the smarter the person is, he is the present. The more confused a person is, the longer he sees.

03

middle-aged, it is an extremely difficult age.

what you saidThink twice about every word, every thing you say and do.

there is a saying in the Golden Age:

Middle-aged people have no one to walk for you. You should learn to do things carefully and not to add more trouble and burden to yourself.

the hurdle of middle age, there is no one to turn it over for you. You should learn to be confused, put aside your gains and losses, and stop creating problems and disasters for yourself.

May you and I, polished by the years, become wiser and more thorough.

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