Beautiful morning light, accompany you to read.
the biggest scam of education
is to release children
not long ago, a netizen filmed a terrible scene on the road: a 9-year-old boy dared to drive on the road.
then the traffic police came, and the mother on the copilot smiled and asked, "Don't scare the child, has the child been found driving?"
the survey found that it was the mother who picked up the child from school and the child was pestering to drive. The mother thought that the child was smarter and had the experience of driving a toy car, so she agreed to let the child practice.
netizens commented: "parents have been so indulgent when they were young that they may go and start a fire when they grow up."
how can toy car experience be compared with standard driver's license qualifications?
the mother knows the law and breaks the law, and the child acts recklessly, taking chances and challenging the rules.
she regards her child's behavior as "naive and lively" and "willing to try". She does not stop or educate her children, and always feels that disciplining her children is restraint, bondage, and shackles, which is not conducive to their free growth.
in fact, if the parents do not teach, the children will not know the rules, let alone the geometry of danger, and where the boundary is;
whether the parents do not care, the children will have no respect and fear, and it will happen sooner or later.
A Tsinghua professor was outraged: "the biggest scams of Chinese education are happy education, useless academic qualifications, and the release of children's nature. these three scams are distorting the growth of Chinese children step by step."
there are too many parents who regard "unleashing their children's nature" as an unfettered, laissez-faire "release of their children".
everything depends on the child, and he calls it "free education of love" for fear that strict discipline will hurt the child's young heart.
do not realize that parents regard the loose freedom given to their children as love, resulting in their children's lack of awareness of rules, which is often the beginning of disaster.
families who do not know how to set rules
cannot raise promising children
Professor Li Meijin said: "it is necessary to educate children as early as possible. Children under 6 years old. Parents' words are gold. After the children are 12 years old, their parents' words are rubbish."
there is an old professor whose 17-year-old son asks him for something every day. If his father refuses to do so, the child will jump from the window and threaten to die.
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the old father had no choice but to compromise again and again, once or twice, today's mobile phone, tomorrow's computer, acquired games, Nike shoes, bicycles, all satisfy the children.
later, the old father realized that there was no way to go on like this, so he turned to Professor Li Meijin for help. her answer was:
"it's too late. When the child is 3-6 years old, you can't take care of it, but you can't control it now. You have to give it. You can only endure if you can't afford it."
the old father has been eaten by his children and become "parents who are afraid of their children's anger and offending their children."
when the child only asked for candy at the beginning, the father did not explain the rules clearly, and would only satisfy and indulge the child without a bottom line, one with five and a hundred. Feed the child an unbridled appetite.
parents can't afford more expensive things, so they start to say "no" to their children.
Children also learn to use their own safety as a bargaining chip to threaten their parents and win their parents' persuasion and concessions.
if parents raise their children as "ancestors", children will treat their parents as "fools".
indulge the child's "free bear" in the name of love, it will cost a hundred times and a thousand times the cost to make up for the lesson of "rules" in the future.
one night after 11:00, Xiao Yu was still immersed in TV. His mother advised him to go to bed early, but Xiao Yu ignored him.
his mother angrily turned off the TV, which angered Xiao Yu. He punched and kicked his mother, leaving her bruised all over, and was later diagnosed with a fracture of his left leg by the hospital.
the father, who is always on the night shift, reprimanded his child and moved the TV away. Unexpectedly, Xiao Yu became more and more intense. Whenever something went wrong, he hit his mother with a wine bottle, and his mother fled back to her mother's house with fear.
what is the attitude of the child's father?
when the reporter asked why the child's behavior was not reported to the police, the father replied: "the child is in the rebellious period, give him a chance."
and my mother chose to be patient: "the ugliness of the family should not be made public."
the mother even wondered: "We are looking forward to the success of our children, but if the children fail, they will not be able to do so. what should we do?"
through their attitude, we can see that they are tolerant to Xiao Yu. They can give it to them if they want to play with their mobile phones, and there is nothing they can do to indulge in TV, and even beat their own mother without admonishment or punishment.
it is the pampering of parents that has finally turned their children into white-eyed wolves who do not abide by school rules, lack of courtesy, shame, and lack of gratitude.
someone has said a very cruel reality: "parents' shelf life is the first 10 years of their children. After the expiration date, it is useless for parents to make every effort and make up for it."
how many parents, when they should educate their children when they are young, ignore and satisfy their children and wish they could even pick the stars and moon from the sky to show their parents' love for their children.
when the child comes to the rebellious period, he gradually shows his own personality, has his own independent thinking, and has to bear the pressure of study, and only wants to escape from the nagging of his parents and the shackles of his family.
seeing that their children are tired of learning, puppy love, declining grades, indulging in games and asking for money all day, parents begin to want to take care of it, but they can't do anything about it. One small quarrel every two days, one big quarrel every three days, and frequent parent-child conflicts.
parentsUndisciplined love is a hurtful knife that destroys a child and hurts himself.
as the ancients said, "Adults are uncomfortable, but they are not adults."
We must not lose the "rules" in our education, nor can we confuse the order of education. if we want our children to become successful, we must first let them grow up.
otherwise, those uncorrected mistakes will one day explode without warning, with amazing power and mutual loss.
the best family education
is the combination of love and rules
Yu Minhong once said in a speech:
"the strictness and rationality of rules for children must be considered."
give children mental freedom, do not interfere and do no harm, but in behavior habits, give children rules, do not indulge or spoil.
some time ago, the long-delayed "think of something!" Dad, finally on the air.
Lucky, the 3-year-old daughter of Qi Wei and Lee Seung-hyun, suddenly has a lot of fans, thanks to their educational concept of "discipline and love".
the so-called love means respecting a child's independent personality and listening to the heart of ta.