When talking to others, talk less about yourself, and you will have more and more blessings.

keep your heart alone and keep your mouth shut in the group.

in this life, it is impossible to live in a vacuum, and naturally there is no way to escape interpersonal communication.

friends naturally have to be made, but in the process of communication, you must be careful and leave some way out for yourself.

and for those who are not worthy of your heart, be sure to keep your mouth shut and your enthusiasm should be reserved.

Don't talk to each other deeply.

because you seem to be smart and communicate sincerely, sometimes you are laying mines for yourself.

so, when talking to people, don't judge others casually, don't show your cards casually, and learn to be a "quiet" smart person.

01

what is your secret

secret?

there is an interesting explanation:

A person can have a lot of friends and communication circles, but even your closest friends and family should leave a little secret.

it's not that we are insincere to others, but that we should give each other some private space properly so that we can't let each other be too naked.

keep some privacy in order to make the relationship last forever.

I saw such a reader's story in the message before.

readers had a very close friend a few years ago. They talked about almost everything, and they knew all their likes and dislikes.

in a chat, on a whim, the reader opened up to his friends and said a lot of things he had never said to anyone before.

as a result, one day a few months later, when the reader was chatting with another friend, she said that the reader's friend had told her all the secrets the reader had told her that day and added a lot of unnecessary things.

after learning about this, the reader was very upset, but she did not choose to confront her friends.

because, in her opinion, a person who can easily blurt out other people's trust is not worth doing his best, and certainly not worth wasting feelings on her.

therefore, friends should not reveal all their secrets and privacy, because friends also have their own friends, and what you call serious business may be just talk after dinner in other people's mouths.

there are business and private affairs in the world. Public affairs should be known to everyone, but private affairs need not be known to others.

because leaking secrets is a weakness of human nature.

if you meet people and say, "I have a secret to tell you, please don't tell anyone." "the person who hears your secret will certainly say to the third party," I have a secret to tell you, please don't tell anyone. "

after not much tossing and turning, the so-called secret is known all over the world.

therefore, learning to keep a secret is one of the required courses for adults, which is not only related to your life, but also to the friendship between friends.

02

if you complain

, the effect of every complaint will be "butterfly effect".

maybe you just think it's a sentence, but it will have a very negative impact on your future actions.

to use a very vivid analogy, complaining is like a poison, which is not fatal at once, but it is painful.

interpersonal relationships are, in the final analysis, an exchange of energy, and if you are a person who treats others as "emotional trash cans", you can't blame others for avoiding you.

because anyone will choose to get close to those who can bring positive energy to themselves.

I have heard such a thing from a business executive before.

I once had a "pig teammate" who was in charge of a new project, ranging from weird clients and demanding bosses to interns who handed in reports an hour late.

once we worked overtime together, a key data was wrong anyway, and I didn't know what the problem was, so I had to do it over and over again. She was still sighing:

I had been patient before, and I was angry that day:

she looked even more shocked than me: "I didn't think it would affect you. I just complained casually."

Life is really hard. People are sunny animals, and no one likes to listen to things full of negative energy.

when you keep complaining, you will be surrounded by negative energy. The more negative energy you have, the more you want to complain. In such a vicious circle, people around you will feel your negativity and will naturally leave you.

so don't complain to the people around you, it won't solve any problems, but it will destroy your will, reduce your enthusiasm, interfere with your life, and affect your relationships.

03

past achievements

are full of losses and modest benefits.

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people have a natural weakness, that is, they love to show off. Little do you know that the more you show off, the more you will lose and bring disaster to yourself.

because those who like to show off are arrogant, and their showing off often hurts others. If you meet someone with a strong sense of jealousy, you will forge a bad bond and bury a curse for yourself.

so, there are people outside the world, and the most taboo thing to be a man is to get carried away and show off because of his little achievements.

Zhang Xiaobiao, a poet of the Tang Dynasty, took part in the imperial examinations several times, but all ended in failure.

thanks to the encouragement of Li Gentry, Jinshi and the first were finally promoted.

at the time of his success, Zhang Xiaobiao proudly wrote a poem to show off to Li Gentry:

and Li Gentry repliedHe:

Li Gentry's implication is to tell Zhang Xiaobiao: don't be complacent about your achievements and prove your success to others.

people with real strength will be known all over the world even if they don't publicize it.

conversely, no matter how much you boast, it won't help.

is tall without boasting, high but not proud.

most of the time your boasting is nothing but grandstanding like a clown in the eyes of others.

this is the way life is. Inferiority is the only way to show off, love is the lack of love, and your ostentation is useless except to prove that you are incompetent.

therefore, even if you have the ability to be arrogant, you should keep a low profile. It is the great wisdom of life to act like a fool.

everyone should always be a little mysterious.

in our lives, the most difficult thing is not to learn to speak, but to be silent.

when you don't know how to shut up, you never know what kind of weapon you will turn into if you say it next, hurting others as well as yourself.

therefore, don't be brave in everything. People who know how to be silent tend to be wiser than those who can talk.